LEX Is More

by LEX the Lexicon Artist

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

      $5 USD  or more

     

1.
03:49
2.
03:42
3.
03:09
4.
02:40

credits

released March 4, 2017

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

LEX the Lexicon Artist Berkeley, California

LEX the Lexicon Artist writes and performs intellectual comedy rap, aka "smart rap".

contact / help

Contact LEX the Lexicon Artist

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: L.E.X.
[Intro]

My name is LEX
I am a rapper
I wrote this rhyme on the crapper, whaat?

[verse 1]

Now everybody that can hear this sound
Put your muthafuckin hands in the air right now
But if you got a small dick put em down
Cause i’m looking for a fella that is well endowed, uh

Just kidding, I am not a size queen
Just a fan of cool licks, ice cream
Screamin’ like I’m Pewdiepie on a livestream
Flow cold like Articuno, ice beam

I’m high on IQ and drugs, limitless
These guys wanna give me hugs, minivest
If I succumb to my delusions of omnipotence
I’ll get my head cut by Macduff, Inverness

I’m goin’ crazy like a mammal, batshit
I’m dropping bars like I’m droppin, acid
I eat it up like a cake, fat kid
Fill me in the next day, madlibs

[chorus]

Why you fuckin’ with that L.E.X
Man I heard it all so what you gonna tell me next?
That I’m rude as fuck? That I’m selling sex?
I’d deny it but a lot of truth is said in jest

I’m like

Why you fuckin’ with that L.E.X
Man I heard it all so what you gonna tell me next?
That I’m whack as hell? I got no respect?
I’d deny it but a lot of truth is said in jest

[verse 2]

I’m gettin turnt like a centrifuge, spinnin’ out
Your whole game like your hair, thinnin’ out
And I’m gettin death threats any minute now
I’m out in California catching beef, in-n-out

I like to keep it kinda funny, hashtag
But the drinking takes a toll, Fastrak
I hit it right on the head, snapback
You fuckers put it on the wrong side, asshat

Now errybody in the club get tipsy
I’m walkin round wearing jeans that dont fit me
I got some holes in my crotch, getting thrifty
Fuck getting rich, I’ll die trying, Fifty

Look at me, I ain’t got no street cred
I’m too wholesome and bland, wheat bread
I’m a straight A graduate from UCB and
I’d rather eat a dick than get a B, I’d rather be dead

[chorus]

[bridge]

Yeah I’m the best, really I got nothing left to say
The fellas say i got the best ass in the bay
I like to claim I got it working out every day
But I got it eating pita chips and sippin on some alize

Big dreams but I’m really fuckin lazy
People tell me Alex you crazy, I say maybe
Keep writing wordplay till writing words pays me
But till then, I can do this all day, see

[verse 3]

Souped up in a Cadillac, miso
Meter won’t give my quarter back, tebow
Got an ese in the back seat, mijo
Wrote a song about myself, ego

Ripped off lonely island, semicolon
I’m just low on motivation, Kelly Rowland
I wanna be on top, but all the gender roles
Got me fucked up like hentai, tentacles

Hear the voices in my head, bad sign
Tryna tell me that I’m mental, gaslight
They wanna try to steal the spotlight, costar
Beat they fucking teeth in, crowbar

My thoughts standing in the crowd, unimpressed
Not a no, not a yes, to some extent
I broke a God-given promise, covenant
Now I’m doing wordplay in hell, punishment

[chorus]

[outro]

What, what, why, why
Why you fuckin’ with that L.E.X
What, what, why, why
Cause a lot of truth is said in jest, I'm like

What, what, why, why
Why you fuckin’ with that L.E.X
What, what, why, why
Why you fuckin’ with that, why you fuckin' with that
Track Name: Undateable
[verse 1]

Most of my life, I was undateable
If love was a game, I was unplayable
I didn’t want it that way, I liked plenty of guys
But I was not a romantic entity in their eyes

I was the weird nerd, the one with glasses
I was the overachiever, top of my classes
I was the awkward loner eating lunch in the corner
I was the kid who got picked last in soccer practice

Followed the rules, no skirts above the knee
But to be totally honest there wasn’t much to see
And I began to believe I was worthless and ugly because
Nobody wanted to fuck me

But see,
In a world where a girl’s source of self esteem
Is being pretty enough to star in your wet dreams
Well her relationship status really matters to her
If she doesn’t have it it’s like she has no identity

I lived through the fragility of my own name
Till I found respectability in my own brain

[HOOK]

We are, Miss Undateable
We are, just unfazeable
Nobody wants us, we do it ourselves
Nobody wants us, we’re giving them hell
I said
X2

[verse 2]

Number one question for an undateable chick
Do I really have to settle for an inflatable dick? (ugh)
As time went on I found the answer to that question
My discovery was really rather depressing

All of a sudden in college everyone wanted to fuck
All of a sudden acknowledged I was a prospect to fuck
All of the problems I had with confidence I thought that I could
Stop by fucking lots of people now that people think I’m hot (woo)

But it was not the panacea to my issues
Cause dudes had me feeling used like a pack of tissues
Stay and chat for a second, jeez, I just banged you
And I don’t get a last name or even a thank you?

Damn! Hooking up’s way too easy
But getting them to stay and maybe date you? Beats me
I ain’t even needy I don’t need the exclusivity
Who’d have thought attractiveness could lead to negativity?

You know what I think? I think you’re scared of me
You’re scared of girls with my level of mental clarity

[HOOK]

[verse 3]

Then there’s the racists, that stuff’s fucked up
Saying shit that just leaves me dumbstruck
Like, I ain’t tryna be your geisha girl cumslut
And Asian vaginas aren’t sideways you dumb fucks!

God! This shit drives me insane
Cause nothing’s changed, I’m still hating the dating game
Maybe I shouldn’t complain, I’ve got it okay
I don’t have time for a guy cause I’m writing all day

I wrote my way out of extremely low confidence
Before I rapped I had completely no consequence
Honest to god I wanna make competence popular
Onto the populace, turn the commoners to philosophers.

And notwithstanding all the problems we constantly face
Autonomous women’s ambitions will fall into place
I’m confident that we undateables will make it
Break the internet with our brains, no need to get naked

Cause

[HOOK]
Track Name: Alive
[verse 1]

They say that, you gotta sell something you don’t have first
So Imma, pretend i’m decent for the whole damn verse
But not too long ago I thought nothing could ever be worse
Than living life like a stage play that I never rehearsed

Cause they say

Sing for the moment, they tell you, freeze it and own it
We know this, but would you rather be working out or eating a donut?
But if you go for the marshmallow you’re not a grownup
So I’m sitting here bitch made, waiting for shit to show up

But every brain cell that I’m spending sitting overthinking
Could be the same cell that I’ll liquidate with overdrinking
Well I’ve been thinking maybe we got it wrong
To be existing in a predictable beat of a song

So right now

If you’re alive put your hands up
California put your mother fuckin hands up
East bay put your goddamn hands up
Lemme see you put your muthafuckin hands up

Yeah, if you’re alive put your hands up
California put your mother fuckin hands up
Taipei put your goddamn hands up
Throw em up to the sky if you feel alive

[verse 2]

See life’s a mystery, that’s why we study history
But learning from my screwups has never quite been a fit for me
i spent my energy on the major asymmetry
In my left brain, fairly uncommon in the industry

And I crave fame but I’m jaded by the limiting
Framework where famous tends to operate artistically
And so I’d stay up running the same words in my head
Dreading the fact that I won’t catch a break realistically

But if the UCs evaluate holistically
And if the rap game’s saturated statistically
Then maybe that means I don’t have to live so cynically
Cause people flip their shit at a rapper with my ethnicity

You’ll won’t catch me filming concerts on an iphone
Live in every minute like i’m crossing over timezones
Fuck the status quo I’ll make the genre my own
Keep writing lyrics that’ll get your fucking mind blown

Yeah, if you’re alive, put your hands up
California put your mother fuckin hands up
East bay put your goddamn hands up
Lemme see you put your muthafuckin hands up

Yeah, if you’re alive put your hands up
California put your mother fuckin hands up
Taipei put your goddamn hands up
Throw em up to the sky if you feel alive

That’s what I tell myself, but I’m a perfectionist
I wish that being a hedonist was more effortless
I wish success was dependent on only cleverness
But all this other bullshit makes me think that I ain’t meant for this

But never mind, I’m feeling now while I’m thinking big
Take over the world with just a pen between my fingertips
I’ll run the marathon, I don’t have to sprint to it
Cause living’s like I’m doing my taxes, I’m fucking intuit

[final chorus]

Yeah, if you’re alive, put your hands up
California put your mother fuckin hands up
East bay put your goddamn hands up
Lemme see you put your muthafuckin hands up

Yeah, if you’re alive put your hands up
California put your mother fuckin hands up
Taipei put your goddamn hands up
Throw em up to the sky if you feel alive
Track Name: Glasses
Glasses

[verse 1]

Yeah I wear glasses, so what?
I can make your whole fanbase go nuts
Cause being nerdy is cool, it’s time to grow up
Or maybe you’re a little jelly cause your flow sucks.

I’m sicker than a chick sticking her fingers into her throat tryna throw up
All the donuts she binged
in a split second reckoning she’ll never be anything more than a record setter for eating all the donuts

I’m blowing up like a samsung note 7
I open fire, no handgun, no weapon
Damn son, I was rapping back in 07
Back when I was trapped with the Catholics tryna go to heaven

And I was rapping with my glasses on
Can’t remember the last time I didn’t have them on
So elastic with the lyrics like an epsilon
They’re an apt representation of my lexicon

So

[hook]
Get off your asses
I’m a rap star, hit em with the glasses
Uh
X2

[verse 2]

Four eyes used to be uncool
So I was a geek in school
My friendgroup was a cesspool of massive tools
Giving me shit because I followed the rules (shit)

I’ll duel you like I’m Alexander
I’ll take your ass to school like I’m Bernie Sanders
I’m your chief commander, I exceed the standard
While the cheaters next to me are tryna read my answers

Read too many books, I was ten years old
Got a pair of specs and I said here goes
They made me into a rejected weirdo
And became the lens through which i see the world
So

A mechanism for correcting my retina
Injected into my identification ended up setting a
Precedent that nerdy was acceptable
My spectacles
Made me respectable

Oh!

[hook]

[verse3]

I’m only getting better and better
I’m feeling unfettered by tethers or pressure to be the mainstream
I used to dream of getting on Letterman
Then when it ended I settled for making it in my daydreams

But I’m cool now, strange as it may seem
We’re living in the golden age of dank memes
And people dig it when I’m being eccentric
spitting nonsensical shit like I’m in a game of spaceteam

Maybe I’m a legend in the making cause
The way of my trade is so painstaking but
Maybe it’s the method that I shake it up
Shakespeare on your ass, the rap game is up

Smart is in
And my heart is in it
I’m delivering artful lyrics from start to finish
And when they’re
Stepping onto your pedestal
Kicking you in the genitals
Hitting you in the head you can bet i’ll be wearing my glasses

[hook]